Time for jokes…
20. The Lugnuts (0-9) aren’t winning any games, but at least they’re keeping them close (within a dozen… usually).
19. Bears (0-6) haven't lost a game in almost a month. They also haven’t played in almost a month.
18. Millers (2-8). Bliss doesn’t get any— I can’t do it.
17. Blue sOx (3-10). Why isn't this team winning more games? [Nightmare sees Vlade on the roster] Oh. That makes more sense.
16. Mariners (3-9). It’s official, I cursed this team.
15. Yankees (3-7). Y’all need to quick d*cking around and start playing wiffleball.
14. RubberDucks (3-7). Bold-ish prediction: Facetime TWICE tonight.
13. Twins (4-7). I hope flow doesn’t play tonight. But also, I mostly hope he does.
12. Marlins (3-5). Cannablast: 4 games, 4 hits, 4 bombs. He is the chosen one.
11. Chihuahuas (5-7). This week I predict Air Bud and Murse go deep.
10. Team Sanchez (5-7). Bring The Man back to Eagan. We miss him.
9. Rumble Ponies (5-5). Bojack Horseman. I’ve heard good things.
8. RoughRiders (5-5). Hjal has made three series in a row. Dumpy hasn’t missed a game. Watch out for this team.
7. Trash Pandas (6-3). Will these guys (and gal) cool off after not playing in nearly a month? I predict: yes.
6. Manatees (8-4) might go (almost) a month between losses.
5. Baby Cakes (9-1). Nightmare still kinda sucks.
4. Bold prediction of the week, the Americans (9-3) steal one from the Mmmmmets.
3. Vibes (8-2). I recently learned the word, “Cheugy.” At first I thought, “The Vibes probably refer to me as ‘Cheugy’ all the time.” Then I realized, “I’m too old to be Cheugy.” And then I realized, “the Vibes probably don’t think about me as much as I think hope they do.”
2. Crawdads (13-1). Ew.
1. Mets (12-0). I’m already second guessing my bold prediction…